Yes as im sure you know i am being deployed.....again. Yes back to Iraq, 12months, driving truck, hauling fuel. That should answer some of the basic questions i get. Why me.... I don't know. Bad luck, Karma, maybe its fate. When i left last time i wasn't done. I had some fight left in me. I consider it to be much like a referee stopping a fight after only one good punch. This time though, i get "one more round." No im not excited or happy about going back. I am ready and able to finish the job i started 5 years ago. I do not want to go back. Do not confuse my dedication to duty for a desire for combat. If i could put down my rifle and walk away i would. I cant, that is not me. I am not the guy who lets others stand in harms way. I may not be kicking in doors, or jumping out of planes, but each soldier in modern combat is 100% equal when it comes to danger.
I leave behind a lot as i travel this time. My wife Jessica has the monumental task of taking care of 3 kids by herself, all while praying each night for a phone call or email that proves i lasted one more day. My boys Roman and Shamus are too young to understand anything more than "dads at work" but a lack of understanding doesn't shield them from the pain and anger of not having their father around. Marissa will understand the basics, im gone, to war, im fighting the bad guys. The real understanding will elude her for many years.
I will not MOB till later July so we still have time to see everyone and say the good byes and do the fun things we all want to do for the ... possible last time. I will be at the family reunion, i will have a party at my house before i leave to give one last chance for family. I do train for quite some time in June so it will not be as easy for me to prepare everyone as i would have hoped. I will MOB at Fort McCoy, its in Wisconsin. We train there for some time then we are off to Iraq. No, i don't know any exact dates. Last time Fort. Knox was very close to home so many visits were made by family. McCoy is 9 hours of driving so a weekend trip is out of the question.
Here are a few reason why this blog will exist. 1. To provide a lasting history for my family and children to remember what those who wear the uniform have done. 2. To keep family and friends informed of mine and other soldiers wish lists and needs lists, care packages are the greatest thing a soldier can get. 3. To allow for my own thoughts to be expressed to the world without censorship.
If i post a list or URL of an item it is not me asking for anyone to purchase this item. It is a way of silently answering the question i get all the time "what do you need?" "is there anything i can do?" I love you all, some things are just out of my hands to control. Last time a family sent me a personal DVD player and very warm socks and gloves. This family did not know me. They sent the package addressed to a soldier's name they got off a list of deployed soldiers. They sent letters and other items like DVDs and small items. When i look back its not the monetary impact it had, it was easily a $250 dollar care package, but the emotional impact. They just cared enough to find out what soldiers want/use/enjoy and felt that they cared enough. They didn't say if they supported the war. I didn't care. Their (the couple) son i think he was 10 or so wrote a letter describing his hero, who was his grandfather that had fought in WWII and how he wanted to be a hero like him. The political views of the war had not tainted this child's view of those who will stand up and fight when asked to. I do not ask that anyone do this because i chronicled this story, but i ask that for any soldier if you feel as these people did, please send the package. Your soldiers do not ask for your money or gifts, if you send a letter, it can have the same impact. Understand that there are many fighting men and women without a great support network like I have. Last time my abundance of letters and packages was distributed amongst all of my close buddies. We all enjoyed the classroom letters, the food, the magazines, and the wedding notes. There will be much to follow but all i ask is that you read with your mind open and an ARMY pt shirt on. If you don't know what that last comment truly meant just call my father.
4 comments:
i am so grateful that you are willing to serve, and so proud of you for doing so. we will do all that we can to support you and your family while you are away.
Since the first day I met you I knew that Jessica made a terrific choice. This just reinforces that knowlege. You keep your head down and your powder dry. Know that your family is very proud of you.
Hello Sir,
My name is Rachele, my husband's name is Michael.You don't have to remember those names, but just know that God gave your name to us yesterday and told us to pray for you and your family daily. On the occasion that God speaks to our hearts-we listen. So-consider it done.
How I found your Blog: I was listening to our favorite online Christian radio station ( Spirit1broadcasting or http://spirit1.us/ ) through our winampplayer which has a browser. Somehow I found myself looking at blog sites. I just kept clicking on "next blog" and there you were. I chose the RSS feed. When I read your post to my husband who is a retired MSgt.(E7) he cried just as I did. We are disabled people who love God with all our hearts, we just don't "get out much", and don't have much family to speak of, so we pray and ask God all the time to make us useful and bring us people TO US who need our prayers and whatever else we can do for them.
We will follow your posts, and please be sure your wife knows our address, in case she just needs to talk. Sometimes talking to stangers is easier, we don't have to "dance" around our word but just say what we feel.
We will be watching for those URL's you mentioned and if you have buddies who also need someone like us...pass us around will ya?
One warning...we can preach a little, and we quote scripture a lot, but that's our way of sharing what we believe, not trying to make you something your not. For the record: we can't "save, convert" or "keep ya from hell" or whatever the phrases are these days. Heck, if God hasn't called you, you won't answer anyway. Our job is just to make sure you know if you ever heard that call, and to love you. We'd like to do that if you will let us, and if your friends, should there be any, will let us.
God Bless you son, and your family. We hope to get the chance to know you and your family, and your buds. However, if we don't hear anything from anyone, know we will be praying and we believe that God hears and answers! :o)
Rachele & Michael
http://www.myspace.com/beholding_the_lamb
godplezur AT aol DOT.com
john,
you know damn well that if it were at all possible, that i would go back for the third time just to serve with you. i have been there twice and i know what you are about to get into. you know that anything you need, i will do. when i found you at lsa anaconda the first time i was there, it seemed to make things a little easier. we have been best friends since we were sophmores in high scool. although we were best friends before our first deployments, i think the deployments have brought us closer together because of what we share. me and chelle love coming over and hanging out with you guys. we love spending time with the kids, however crazy they may be at times. you are not the only one preparing for this deployment again, i feel like i am going through it all over again too. just know that no matter what happens i will keep close contact to jess and the boys while you are gone so they dont get the feeling that you are too far off. i love you like a brother john, you and your family. just do me one favor, get a pedicure!! tell your dad to keep contact with me, i already have the p.t. shirt. some of these things are obviously easier to say in an email than in person. come back to us john.
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